A Guest Post! Fabulous!!

This is a guest post by an adorable, sweet Czech gal (27, blonde, gorgeous) that has visited and stayed with my parents many times. It comes as a great relief to me that even gorgeous, young things aren't immune to bad dates. Here we go:

One bad date..
I met this guy at a Halloween party last year. He was good looking and nice - on the first sight. I must admit I prefer tall guys and this one simply agreed with my wishes of „guy´s good visage“. I talked to him just for a while. Maybe its time to say that it was a pretty noisy party and we didn´t hear clearly each other. He was a lawyer. Finally I met someone interesting, I thought. After lots of my unsuccessful experiences during that vacation I decided to ask him quickly for his number and gave him mine promptly, as well. But we didnt have much chance to talk more. Now I know I should have marked the fact that he was the only one without a costume that night…

He called me next day as he promised. I knew he lived on the other side of the city, so we couldn´t met until the weekend. He was gruff and close-tongued in the phone. He asked me a bunch of questions (do you have any pets home, are your parents still together, whats your horoscope sign like etc.). I remember I was a bit stressed by this conversation, especially when there wasn´t any funny moments at all. But I thought he might be nervous and „cold“ to me cause maybe one phone call means something impersonal to him…or whatever... Anyways, we settled a date.

He picked me up on time. Good car. But that was all. He acted without any chic, behaved without any ideas, any zest at all! I had to manage our date (as a visitor on my vacation!!). Walking on the pier went to being even worse. He was totally without any sense of humour at all.. Even we talked a lot. For example about his protest against alcohol. Great, I could not have any shots to get some mettle I desperately needed. Than we stopped for some tapas. But he was a vegetarian and wanted to split and share our food. Only vegetables, how cool… I remember this was one of the moments I started to watch my watch.
Sunday afternoon and sooooo much time to spend it somehow. I decided to go to Venice. To enjoy at least some fun, I thought… walking walking walking. That was tolerable. But what came after exceeded my worse date of all.

He wanted to sit on a grass in that little park (in the middle of the famous sidewalk with thousands of people on it). So we sit. He sit next to me, quite close I would say. He suddenly stopped to talk and than IT happend. He was fluttering, shuddering, shaking. His eyes were closed and he started to snort and flew in my ears. He smoothed my hair – but not in a way Id like of course (so f*** slowly and artificially I didnt know what to do!). Yes. I suffered that wierd situation without any moves. I just stayed and waited till it came to the end. I dont know if HE came to the end. And was afraid to ask or to watch him..!! I only know I was so shocked but also wanted to laugh so much!!! OMG it was neverending!!! After about one hour of „letting my date enjoy his time“ I asked him to take me home (why couldnt I find some alibi earlier?!?!?!). Last obligatory kiss was just luckily short.

Honestly, can you tell me this wasnt the worse hanging out ever?!?!?!